ARGHHHHHHHHHHH!

I grew up in rural Alabama. There was one time as a teenager, that my friend and I rode bikes out to a creek that was so far away from civilization that we could, and did, scream out our frustrations. (note to Tammy - do you remember that?) That is what I want to do today. I say that, but after living in civilization for 15 years, I think I would be scared to be so far in the middle of no-where that no one could hear me scream - lol.
Nothing really bad is going on, just the same old stuff, but my frustration level has reached maximum capacity. It is bound to come out in some way sooner or later. Maybe I should take up kick-boxing or something. I used to do Tae-bo - it was a great stress reliever. Hmmmmmm... I'll have to think about that.

Please Wait

Matt and I finally got to go see "Fireproof" last night. The movie was awesome, and we both especially liked a song in the movie "While I am Waiting" by John Waller. After the movie Matt and I talked about how we are in a "Waiting" time in our walk with God. I think we all encounter those times in our lives. Matt and I have not always been the best at waiting. We always exchange Christmas and Birthday presents long before the given day. When we have to wait for an anwer from someone, it drives us crazy. We were talking about how we think we have done a LITTLE better this time at waiting. Just as we said that, we came to a red light. Literally - we were driving down the road, and came to a red light. We sat there for a LONG time. And it did not change. We started laughing. Doesn't God have a great sense of humor :) We finally turned right (on red), then did a u-turn to get to where we needed to be. Then today I was trying to schedule an appointment, and the lady said "I'm sorry, you will have to call back because my computer keeps telling me "Please Wait" " Too funny.
"Why would you ever comlain, O Jacob, or, whine, Irsael, saying, "God has lost track of me. He doesn't care what happens to me"? Don't you know anything? Haven't you been listening? God doesn't come and go. God LASTS. He's Creator of all you can see or imagine. He doesn't get tired out, doesn't pause to catch his breath. And he knows everything, Inside and out. He energizes those who get tired, gives fresh strength to dropouts. For even young people tire and drop out, young folk in their prime stumble and fall. But those who wait upon God get fresh strength. They spread their wings and soar like eagles, They run and don't get tired, they walk and don't lag behind."
Isaiah 40:27 - 31 Message version

Life

I can't believe it has been almost one whole month since I last posted. The reason why it has been so long is "life". This post is mostly for myself. I can think more clearly when I write things out. Matt and I have some decisions to make as far as what to do, where to go next. But we also want to let God decide where we go and what we do. The hard part is knowing where the line is between those two things. Matt has sent his resume to 3 or 4 churches, some are youth positions, some are senior pastor positions. And he has been preaching at a WONDERFUL little church in our area the past month or so. They are going to be voting on him for an interim position some time soon. God's hand has definately been involved in us going to this church. They need someone to lead them, love them, and be a part of them; and we need a church like they are, that is excited to grow and serve Christ. We are also leaving the door open that God may lead us to stay at this church long term. All of the other churches that we have sent Matt's resume to are larger churches. Really there is one main reason why we kind of want to go to a larger church this time. "Life" We have been so busy the past 5 years with Matt teaching full time, pastoring a church, driving for school events, being the president of our home owners association... and me taking care of (usually) 2 medical foster kids, our 3 kids at home, working occasionally (usually nights), teaching/serving in the church, homeschooling, and being a mom and wife. We are definately NOT in ministry for the money - if we were, we would choose different careers - lol. BUT the thought of Matt only having one "job", and if that job (ministry) would pay most of our bills, that would free me up to put more time and attention into our family. Also, right now I am waiting on another medical foster care placement, and working 3 - 4 nights/week until then. There is a school nurse position open near our house, and I would love that. BUT I absolutely do NOT want to put the kids in public school. I really want to homeschool them. For the main reason of - I want to be the one to teach my kids. I LOVE homeschooling them, and the thought of not being able to do that breaks my heart. I don't want to look back one day and realize that we worked so much that we missed time and opportunities with our kids. Having said all of that, at the end of this life, when I stand before God, I want to hear Him say "well done, my good and faithful servant". And if that means that for the rest of my life that God wants us to be as busy as we have been the past 5 years, then I am o.k. with that.
Funny kid story: I had an appointment with Logan yesterday and needed a babysitter for Madi, Ty, and La. All of the people I usually use were not available. So we asked Stephanie - she is the wife of a friend/co-worker of Matt's. Matt comes in today and says I have to tell you what happened while Stephanie was here with the kids yesterday. I automatically said "oh no". Matt said, no - it isn't bad, it's funny. The twins informed her that they used to be "frozen". Stephanie said "Oh really, were you cold?" They said "Yep, we were frozen". Then Madison asked Stephanie if she knew Madison's last name. She said "Yes, it's Gilmore" Madison said "no, not that last name - I used to have a different last name, but my mom and dad won't tell me what it is." Stephanie went home and had LOTS of questions for her husband - LOL. I guess that's one reason it can be good to tell people about specific adoption issues - lol. For those that may not know, we adopted the twins as embryos - they actually were frozen embryos. And we don't tell Madi all of her information for safety reasons until she is older.