Hold On

The last few weeks have been trying for me, and the past few days even more trying. I have to admit the temptation to let go of my responsibilities and be free from my stress has crossed my mind. Dealing with depression I get overwhelmed easily, and sometimes I feel so overwhelmed that I can't even picture a beginning point to start a better process of dealing with things... especially things that are out of my control.

But then when I look at the blessings God has given me through my responsibilities, I am reminded of how I am truly blessed. I do pray for less stress in my life, and for better ways of dealing with it. I pray for more opportunities to enjoy life to the fullest, the way God intended. I pray that I will hear God clearly and obey Him in every area of my life.






In the mean time, I pray that I can simply hold on. I took this picture of our foster baby holding onto my arm. He does this often. His tiny hand can't even grasp my arm, but he holds on tightly - in a way that lets me know he loves me and he doesn't want me to let him go. May I hold onto my Heavenly Father in that same way... there is NO way my tiny hands can even begin to grasp His mighty arms, His mighty strength or power; but if I hold onto him - showing Him with my love and my feeble attempts to hold onto Him, that I NEED Him to hold me tightly and not let go... I know He will not give up on me, and He will not let go.

Lots of thoughts, but no mind to control them

I have lots of thoughts I really want to write about; but after being so sick last week, I have had a hard time recovering and have am having daily migraines, nightly night terrors, and a bout with depression and the blahs... so I don't really have the clarity of mind or the motivation to follow thru with what I really want to write about; so they will just have to wait. But I think it is some really good stuff to talk about, u may not think so - lol; but I do :)

Please pray that I recover quickly. I don't have time to be sick. Biggest prayer need is for the depression to go away and energy to return. Thank you VERY much!!!!

shauna

what do YOU think?

OK, what do u think of all the natural disasters lately? Are they increasing, are we just more aware as there is more coverage, is it a cycle, is it what the Bible talks about?? Just curious as to your opinions, of course no one knows for sure; and we won't know for sure until the day we finally get to go home :)


China: Earthquakes in Qinghai Province - Apr 2010
Tajikistan: Floods - Apr 2010
Brazil: Floods and Landslides - Apr 2010
Mexico: Earthquakes - Apr 2010
Peru: Floods and Landslides - Apr 2010
Russian Federation: Floods - Mar 2010
Solomon Islands: Cyclone Ului - Mar 2010
DR Congo: Floods - Mar 2010
East Africa: Floods - Mar 2010
Fiji: Cyclone Tomas - Mar 2010
Kazakhstan: Floods - Mar 2010
Madagascar: Cyclone Hubert - Mar 2010
Southern Africa: Floods - Mar 2010
Serbia: Floods - Mar 2010
Haiti: Floods and Mudslides - Mar 2010
Chile: Earthquake - Feb 2010
Madeira: Floods and Mudslides - Feb 2010
Caribbean: Drought - Feb 2010
Pakistan: Avalanche - Feb 2010
Cook Islands: Tropical Cyclone Pat - Feb 2010
Ecuador: Floods - Feb 2010
Afghanistan: Floods and Avalanches - Feb 2010
Mexico: Floods and Landslides - Feb 2010
French Polynesia: Cyclone Oli - Feb 2010
Solomon Islands: Floods - Jan 2010
Egypt: Floods - Jan 2010
occupied Palestinian territory: Floods - Jan 2010
Haiti: Earthquakes - Jan 2010
Mongolia: Dzud - Jan 2010
Montenegro: Floods - Jan 2010
Bolivia: Floods - Jan 2010
India/Nepal/Bangladesh: Cold Wave - Jan 2010
Pakistan: Landslides and Floods - Jan 2010
Solomon Islands: Earthquake - Jan 2010
Tajikistan: Earthquake - Jan 2010

Taken from: www.reliefweb.int/rw/rwb.nsf/doc110?OpenForm

NOT to even mention these and all the disasters they have caused ;)
Madison - Dec 1999
Tyler and Lauren - 2003
Had to add those - LOL ;)

Health issues

Well, I guess I don't do anything half way - lol. I have had shingles for 1 week now, and still in pain (that is normal). I now have a BAD sinus infection and possible pneumonia - started on antibiotics today. The starting spot of my shingles is right where my bulging disk in my spine is, so that adds drastically to the pain.

The twins are breaking out with what looks like chicken pox, will know for sure in a day or two. So far the baby is good, PLEASE, PLEASE pray he doesn't get chicken pox!!

On a brighter note, the kids have really stepped up to the plate and have been such big helpers. They really are compassionate kids, and they have shown me how much they really do care about me this past week. They have been taking good care of mommy. They were not real happy though when I felt like doing about 20 minutes of homeschool work this morning. lol

The baby is only 6 months old, almost 7 months, and he is crawling, pulling to a stand, pulls his oxygen off all the time, pulls everything off the coffee table, eats the kids schoolwork (don't have to worry about the dog doing that, the baby takes care of it). SO... today, we put up a pack and play in the family room - smart decision! He is happy as long as we are in the room, but will NOT allow us to leave the room ;)

Heading to bed now - hoping for some good rest :)

Answers

OK, back to the question I posted several weeks ago...

I REALLY like what Brenda and April said. And I did answer her with something similar, but a little short of where I probably should have taken it. In my every day conversations with the kids, or with anyone I am having a discussion with; I answer with a question probably 90% of the time, ask open ended questions, and try to get them to answer their own questions - or at least help them think through and clarify what they are thinking to begin with. I do that, because of all my years of working with kids, etc. BUT... leave it to me - I didn't do that with her that day. And the frustrating thing is - I really would like to know why she is asking these questions, and see a little bit deeper into her life and where she is at with her relationship with God, etc.

What I did tell her was that no one is perfect, and we all make mistakes. That we can't truly know a person's heart, or where they are at in their life - personally or with God. But I also said that sometimes, people "claim" to be Christians, but don't really have a relationship with God. They live by a set of rules, and have a "religion" rather than truly loving and knowing God. Again, I wish I would have dug deeper into her questions, etc. This lady is someone I know through foster care, and she sees the ugly of the ugliest when it comes to how people live their lives. And I am thinking that may be part of why she asked that question.

I am going to contradict myself here - I think we should be VERY careful about not judging others, but rather show them God's love; because you never truly know a person's heart, OR their life situation. On the other hand, it also upsets me greatly when Christians are given a "bad name" because of people who claim to be a Christian, and yet live a lifestyle that causes people to say "if that is what a Christian is, I don't want to be one". Having said that; only God truly knows our hearts, and He is the only one that we should be living for anyway.

Other "answers" this week:

we FINALLY have an offer on our house, after 18 months!! I am SOOOOOOOOOOO happy!! Hopefully it will all work out.


Several days ago I couldn't figure out why I had such bad nerve pain on the left side of my back and stomach...now I have an answer - I have SHINGLES!!!!! I told Matt "I thought only old people got that" His response "well...." :( And let me tell you it is every bit as painful as you have heard!!! Mine start on my lower back, wind around to my lower tummy and thighs and unfortunately it is still spreading - I REALLY hope it stops SOON!!!!