Regrets

We all have regrets in life. Things we wish we would have done differently, or maybe not done at all. I was going through some stuff today while trying to purge and pack (we are moving soon). I found where Granny had sent me a birthday card a few years ago. In it, she had included a picture of her at her 81st birthday party. On the back of the picture she had written..."The family gave me a birthday party, and I thought you might like a picture" I don't really remember all the circumstances that were happening at that time, but I do remember that I didn't find out about the party until shortly before it, and I was not able to make plans to attend. Granny meant the world to me, and it hurts that she thought I just didn't want to come. We had a chance to talk after that, and I feel confindant that she knew how much I loved her, and she was not upset with me about not attending her birthday party. However, I wish that circumstances could have been different, and that I could have attended this party that obviously meant a lot to her.

There are bigger regrets in life though. Times when we choose to do the wrong thing instead of the right thing. Times when we hurt God by our sins, when we hurt ourselves by going against His will. I have those regrets too, just like you, just like everyone. When we offend, hurt, or disappoint "people" we often get a reaction that isn't pleasant. So... we tend to expect the same from God. We wait for something "bad" to happen because we know we have sinned. Or we wonder what we did wrong when something bad happens in our lives. I have had those thoughts before. When Tyler had his surgery, especially the first one, I kept thinking that God might take my son away from me because of sin in my life.

All of this is coming together in my mind because of several things that have happened lately. I have had the privaledge of witnessing to 2 people recently, both of which had questions about "doing things right"... I had someone else close to me call and tell me through tears that she was scared that God would allow something bad to happen to her daughter because while reading "The Shack" she began to think that she would be angry with God and possibly unforgiving if something bad happened to her daughter. Matt gave me a video to watch by Louie Giglio "Hope, When Life Hurts Most"... in it Louie talks about how bad things happen to everyone, and there isn't always a "bow" on the package at the end of the story. I also finished reading "Loving our Kids on Purpose" recently, and it has made me look at how I view things in my life - disciplining my kids, how I respond to people around me, and how I respond to God. I can't control what other people do, but I can control me. I have regrets. Sometimes those regrets come with consequences, but never do those regrets take me away from God who has promised to "never leave me nor forsake me". There will be hard times in my life, there will be sad times and lots of regrets; but I will always have the God of the Universe, Who is in complete control at all times, and yet allows me the freedom to make my own choices; I will always have The God who holds the world in His hands to turn to and run to and He will always welcome me with open arms. There will be consequences to sin, but God will never turn away from someone who is honestly looking for Him.
"Which of your fathers, if your son asks for a fish, will give him a snake instead? Or if he asks for an egg, will give him a scorpion? If you then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give the Holy Spirit to those who ask him!" Luke 11:11 - 13
I have many regrets, but my one hope; my salvation; my promise is in Jesus Christ. I will see Granny again. God has already forgiven me for any sin, any mistake I will ever make. Because He paid the price for my sins on the cross, I don't have to worry about Him "punishing" me when I mess up. There may be natural consequences, but God will always love me and never leave me.