So far to go, so little time

I'll be honest... I don't know as much as I think I do; my hearts intentions are sometimes wrong; and just when I think I am on the right track, I see the life signs that say "wrong direction".

God is always at work in our lives, and in my life lately, He has been telling me to trust Him. Seems easy enough. I have heard Him speak, seen Him work, felt His presence, had many heart to heart talks with Him; He is my God, my Father, my Savior, my Friend, my Lord. I have NO reason not to trust Him, and every reason TO trust Him. SO why is it still so hard??

There was a time in my life when I KNEW beyond a shadow of a doubt that God had called me to be a mom; and then I faced infertility. I couldn't understand WHY He would call me to do something, and then not give me the ability to accomplish what He called me to do. Looking back now, I can see how perfect His plan was, how He gets the Honor and the Glory for it all, and I thank Him for my infertility and for my children every day!! Still... at the time, it didn't make sense. Well, I am kinda there again. Not as drastic. But, I sense God leading me in a direction that has all these obstacles in the way... some of which seem to contradict what He is calling me to do. Yet I keep hearing from Him... "trust me".

Lord, help me to trust you even when I don't understand. Help me to follow you even when I can't see you, and can only hear you calling my name. Give me wisdom, patience, understanding, and most of all - help me to trust when I have a hard time doing it on my own. You are God and everything I have is yours. Help me to hear you clearly so that I know what you want me to do. Then help me to be brave enough to follow wherever you lead me. Father, please continue to work on my heart. Teach me to love like You love. Teach me to forgive like you forgive. Please provide a way for me to do what you have called me to do, then may I give you the honor and the glory for it.

I have so far to go before I am the person that God wants me to be; and life is short, so little time to get there. But I pray that every day I will follow Him wherever He leads me, and that with every step I will be a little closer.

Also, on a different note... an update on Matt. (Sorry I haven't called you yet Sharlene!) He severely sprained his ankle, but it is not broken. He has an air cast and crutches; but he can not walk on it at all! Please pray for him tomorrow... he is not sure about preaching sitting down; but I told him that was better than trying to stand up there with crutches the whole time. There's no way. Anyway... he says his softball days are over; and even though he is in a lot of pain, at least he hit a homerun :) For those that don't know... he was playing softball Thur. night and it had rained for about 5 min. before the game started, and when he hit home plate running, his foot slid on the wet base, and his ankle gave way under him.