Hmmmm...

WOULD YOU RATHER:

Be stuck in a small closet for a day or stuck on the top of a ferris wheel for a day?

Postponed

I am not getting my new little one until Monday. We weren't able to get all of her needed medical equipment today. Should be monday though. :)

tomorrow hopefully

I am supposed to pick up my 2 year old baby tomorrow HOPEFULLY!! Setting up her room today. It is exciting any time we get a new foster child, but I am extra excited about this one. I have longed for a baby (and 2 is close enough to a baby for me, especially with her delays) since we had a foster baby die in Nov. 2007. My arms have ached for a baby to cuddle since then. Just so you know, the baby that died was in the hospital when he died. He was a shaken baby - very sick little guy. That was very hard on our family. We had even talked about possibly adopting him if we were ever given that possibility. Then Matt preached his funeral. And 3 weeks later I had a hysterectomy. Tough month!!

Part of my excitement is because my arms will have a baby to cuddle with again, but I am also excited about this specific little girl. We visited her last week and she is SOOOOOOOO sweet! Just can't wait!!

And I don't know what happened with the 9 year old, but I'm sure they found a great place for her. And Audrey, you are right, God definately has sent us specific kids at specific times in our life. He knew who our children and foster children would be, even before they were born. I just have a hard time "waiting" sometimes. I also have a very hard time saying "no" to a child. Even though I know better, I feel guilty EVERY time I have to say "no". And I think I have only said "no" about 3 times in 12 years of foster care.

I will let you all know tomorrow what happens!! :)

Tough decisions

I am frustrated, and torn with a tough decision. This is the second tough decision Matt and I have had to make in the past 24 hours. Both decisions will influence our family dynamic, and how much time we have together. Both decisions are somewhat ministry based, and there is not a WRONG choice, just a good or better choice. BUT there could be some bad outcomes if we don't make the right choice. I know that doesn't make much sense. Sorry.

Let me share a few details about 1 of the decisions:
I visited a 2 year old little girl last week that is supposed to become my foster daughter soon. In the 30 minutes we spent with her, Madi, Lauren, and I all fell in LOVE with her. We are SOOOO excited for her to come. Although she is involved medically, it is not severe, and there is not a lot of social history or time involvement in that area.
I just got a call a little bit ago, that they need a place for a 9 year old little girl with more severe medical conditions, and they are therefore limited in the places they can place her, as well as it is MUCH harder to find placements for older kids vs. little kids. She has a lot of social involvement, as well as lots of trips to doctors appts that will be about 45 min. away from where we live.
I told them that I wanted to stay with the 2 year old. But now I feel selfish and unsure. I KNOW that the 2 year old would be better for my family, and my family really needs a break from stressful and time consuming situations. I know that the 2 year old is the best choice for my family. BUT I feel bad saying "no" to the 9 year old. She needs a home too. What if she doesn't know Christ, and I could have the chance to introduce Him to her. ARGHH. Sometimes I really think I should just find a way to run my own children's home - lol.
Seriously though, please pray for me and for God to show me clearly what I should do, and to give me a peace about it.

thanks!

My sweet Madi

This is Madi. I chose to put the last picture in even though it has Tyler and Lauren in it, because when I look at that picture, I see how it captures her love for her brother and sister. Don't get me wrong, they all fight with each other from time to time. But Madi truly loves her little brother and sister. We call her a little momma. She freaks out in a parking lot if a car even looks like it is going to go in their direction. She is constantly watching out for them. I think this is the only picture we got that day of her really smiling. She was totally in her element with her arms around both of them. She is also such a big help to me with the foster kids. I don't know that I have ever met another kid with the love and compassion that Madi has for everyone. She is growing up and becoming such a beautiful young lady in so many ways.

My little Ty Man

Tyler is such a little man. He LOVES sports of any kind, just like his daddy. He also loves the High School Musical movies - he likes it for the basketball, but he also likes the dance moves. Lauren sings, and he dances - they really make a pair. He also has such a big heart. He will give anything to anybody, he truly cares about people. One thing we struggle with though, is his perfectionism. He cries and gets very upset if he can't do something perfectly. He does NOT like for his picture to be taken, we pretty much have to bribe him to get the few photos that we do get of him. We also have a little math whiz on our hands. We homeschool, and he is doing 1st and 2nd grade math workbooks although he is only in Kindergarden. He has just started reading. He doesn't want to do anything until he thinks he can do it perfect... so he refused to read at all until a few weeks ago, and since then he has finished 2 Dr. Seus books, and 1 beginner reader book about cars. Even at 5 he is protective of his mom and sisters. He truly is my sweet little man.

Oh, and Doni, you know the story you told about Tanner getting grass stains on his jeans during your recent outdoor photo shoot... Notice the cement wall Tyler is standing on in the 3rd picture. Well, Tyler and Lauren decided to slide down it on their stomachs... they both ripped holes in their shirts, brand new shirts I might add. Arghhh!

My little LaLa

I thought I would take a day to post pictures of each of the kids and tell you a little bit about them. Lauren is the baby, granted she is only 30 seconds younger than Tyler, she definately fits the description of the "baby" of the family. I don't know that I have ever seen so much attitude in one little girl. She is the boss - lol. She's the one that flooded our house last year. She has said to 8 and 9 year old boys "you're going down" then she takes them down - lol. She will tell you she doesn't love her brother, but she is very jealous of anyone who takes his attention away from her. And if they are seperated for too long, she starts to ask where he is. She is our cuddle bug. She is most happy when all of her family is in one place, preferable with her in the center. We joke that she will never move out of our house when she is older. I am starting to see her mature a little bit lately. She still has her stubborn side, and wants her way all the time, BUT she has become much more compassionate lately; often offering to share with others without us asking her to. I was buying her a few things at a store the other day and she kept putting stuff back, saying she didn't want me to have to spend all my money on her. Isn't that sweet. She is definately my sweet little LaLa!
Oh, and did I mention that she LOOOOOOOOOVES to have her picture taken? She starts posing any time she sees us get the camera out - lol.